Year in Review 2019

Want to know all my secrets? If you're good at reading between the lines, you'll probably uncover some of the hidden messages I've put in my year in review. Maybe you'll come to realize I'm even talking abou you in some cases... And if you're just nosy, like I am, just enjoy this quick glimpse, month by month, of what I was up to last year!



January
Probably the biggest thing that happened this month was the start of this "blog" I still don't like calling it an official blog because, I don't know, it kind of sounds pretentious. Plus, I don't really mind if nobody reads it, since I started this as a means for me get the thoughts that have been clouding my mind for the past couple years, out. And it's worked. So thank you for allowing me to feel conformable to continue sharing little bits of my life with you.

February
This month was simply more self-reflections. More writing, and trying to understand and figure out my place in this world while working at a job that was sucking the life of me a this point. This was a pretty tough month for me but I went on a couple walks and dramatic gazes out my window with the new Ariana album playing helped alot.




March
In March I finally got surgery on my toe, which was long overdue (read: My Experience with a TNA), and to this day, it's still a little embarrassing to only have 9 toe nails, but the pros still to this day outweigh the cons. But before I was stuck wearing Burkenstocks for 3 weeks in he freezing cold, I attended TedxUofT (an affiliated event between Ted Talks and the University of Toronto. It was an incredible experience (read: My First Ted Talk), and I will probably be attending again this year, if exams and all that don't get in the way.



April
This month was more of the same. I was still working at my PEY, nothing crazy eventful happened, but my parents did go on vacation without me, which at first cheesed me but I ended up truly enjoying the time alone in this massive house (read: 21 and Living on My Own?). My parents are again going on vacation in the early summer so I actually can't wait to get up some more shenanigans while they're gone!

May
In May I got up to some more shenanigans. This month I went to 2 concerts, one was the first I'd gone to alone (read: I Went to a Concert Alone) and the other was for Imogen Heap, which I went to with Ann, one of my close friends from High School who visited Toronto from Ottawa to see the show with me! In May, I also did alot more self-reflecting, as the weather was getting milder and more manageable to go out. I started making my way downtown on weekends just to enjoy the sights and read at a nice cafe. I never had the intentions to meet friends, or do anything crazy but by simply doing the small things that made me happiest, I learned alot of independence and self-care which was very beneficial to me throughout the year!



June
As the summer rolled around, I started getting busier and hanging out with more friends which was really fun! I celebrated my friend Sarah's Birthday and I also took more time... drumroll please... for self-care!! Shocker! But 2019 was really the year of self-care! I went to the Toronto Islands alone to read and get a tan which was lovely. I went on a couple bike rides with my dad which was really fun (that's where I got this beautiful picture of this field of purple flowers). At the same time that I was practicing self-care I was also starting to struggle in my personal life, trying to figure out what I ultimately wanted in the relationships I was in, both friendly and romantically. So needless to say, but the self-care was not only effective, but necessary. Oh and the Raptors won the NBA Championships... but that's no a big deal is it (hehe)



July
Right in the middle of the summer, my PEY was really picking up. I was definitely no longer bored as I started really enjoying the work. I was given much more responsibility and the work was really getting interesting! I also went on some adventure with my friends, the most memorable was with Sarah (the same Sarah who's birthday I went to in June). We rented those tandem bike and ended up having to pedal through thigh deep water as the Islands were slightly flooded so the paths were also very flooded! It was such a funny time, I don't think I'll ever forget those hilarious hours, especially since we weren't the only ones braving the deep waters. We laughed so hard that day it was a great summer day! During this month I also started on my search to find out if I could genuinely get my dual citizenship between Canada and the UK (turns out I can't... yet). Aside from all the technical details, a working VISA would be the best path for me and it would be pretty easy to obtain so I'm excited for the future, potentially in London!



August
As the summer rolled to an end, I completed my PEY which ended up being an overall amazing experience with great people. I learned alot about the field I hope to work in, in the future, and it made me excited to go back to school and graduate. But the biggest event this month was my trip to Las Vegas with my best friend Alyssa. You can read all about those adventure here : Lessons of Las Vegas. It was a roller coaster of a trip, but I really did learn a lot about myself, and had a lot of personal growth.



September
Back to school kids! This month was all about getting back into the grind of school and started my senior year of University. I feel like a broken record now, but I experienced alot of personal growth this month too with the people I was choosing to surround myself with that were not good for me (don't worry I've kicked them out of my life since then, though it took me a while to fully let them go).

October
Oh what a month this was! To make this short and sweet. We celebrated my dad's birthday, I had a run in with the police knocking at my door at 11pm, and I had a long ovverdue high school reunion with my closest friends from grades 11 and 12, after 5 years of us not all being together in the same room! So it was an eventful month, on top of midterm season and all the things that come with school too!



November
November was a fun one. Things somewhat settled down in my personal life. I cut out some more toxic men from my life, had my last Dinner Dance with my Civil Engineering class, explored parts of the city I'd never been to before, took my graduation pictures, and made some new friends! This month I also started really enjoying my courses, and realized that I was choosing the right career path which was honestly a relief. It's an amazing feeling when all those puzzle pieces that made no sense before all come together effortlessly. I hope you have, or will experience that feeling in your life. It's even more than just a weight lifted off your shoulders, it's so much more.


December
Damn. In this last month of 2019, life really threw me a mess of curve balls. I celebrated my 22nd birthday. Had 6 exams in the span of 10 days (I still can't believe I survived, so for that I am very proud of myself). I went to the Christmas Market with my friends, as we have been doing since the first year we became friends, way back in October of 2015! While at the Christmas Market I dabbled once again in disposable camera (I hadn't held a disposable camera since probably grade 3)... the pictures turned out amazing by the way! I continued the month by spontaneously semi-permanently dying my hair purple (ok maybe not so spontaneous since I've been thinking about doing it for almost a year). Turned out great and I honestly get so sad when I take a shower and the colour fades a little more every time. Shortly after, I went out with my friends to see Loud Luxury perform. It was both an incredible night, and one where I learned alot about myself and my limits. I won't get into the details, as it's beyond the level of personal I am whiling to share. Just refer to Selena Gomez's song Look at Her Now and the verses, and I'll leave it at that.

Not saying she was perfect
Still regrets that moment
Like that night
Wasn't wrong, wasn't right,
What a thing to be human 

Made her more of a women

Finally, the year ended with some unexpected surprises, a joyful holiday season and a reflective New Year's Eve.



To the people that are still with me in this new year, thank you for being great friends and always having my back. I wouldn't have made it this far without you. And to the people I've recently made friends with this year, thank you for inviting me into your life, and I can' wait to see what adventure 2020 brings us as we grow our new found friendship!

This new year I look forward to graduating from University, going on a Grad Trip, as one does, and making new memories. I hope to continue surrounding myself with people I love, but most importantly, with people who also care about me equally. This new year is going to be a crazy one with many life changes and adult decisions to make. It won't be an easy year, but I hope some of you will help me get through it, and I will damn sure help any of you as well, just reach out!



Happy New Year!

-Marie

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